Trouble At ShinRad
by cloudmouth
Summary: Sephiroth works for an ad agency; a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Vincent the janitor gives two thumbs up!
1. What's the Buzz?

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did.**_

**_--_**

Sephiroth was a man with his wits about him—or so he liked to think. It is always a good thing to have one's wits about him, but it is also a good thing to have them rattled every once in a while with a good love interest. It keeps the "creative juices" flowing. Sephiroth had had none of these for a while—love interests, that is—in fact, he realized, his sea-foam gaze landing upon the blank piece of paper in front of him, he hadn't had any for a long while. He had had a week to come up with ideas for ShinRad's new project, a soap suds commercial. ShinRad was the company for which Sephiroth worked; one of the most prominent ad agencies in the country, and Sephiroth was the best ShinRad had to offer. However, the black wire mesh basket at his feet was compromising his reputation, overflowing with barely-scribbled-upon pieces of paper—ideas that had turned out to be insufficient.

A voice and a head of spiky red hair poking into his office jarred him from his inner reflections. "Hey, Seph, you look frustrated. Wanna go get a coffee? Clear your mind?" It was Reno, his partner. To call Reno a "partner" might have been a bit of an overstatement, considering Sephiroth normally came up with most of the ideas, pacing back and forth across the little red rug in the center of his office, sketchpad in hand—while Reno normally sat in the larger man's chair with his feet on the desk, a take-out box containing some sort of noodles in his lap.

"...Coffee? Yes, I suppose that might—" he was interrupted by the crackling of his intercom:

"Sephiroth, sir, Boss-Man ShinRa wants to see you in his office; he said to be there 'as fast as his little legs can carry him.'" The voice on the other end belonged to Sephiroth's secretary, a spiky-haired brunette named Sora. It sounded as though the boy had a donut shoved halfway down his throat.

He smiled as he pressed the red button. "Tell the 'Boss-Man' that I'll be up in a moment."

"I'll be sure to let 'im know you'll be at his door in the amount of time it takes a man of your size to climb five flights of stairs... and that you'll take them two at a time," Sora replied cheerily. Whatever had been in his mouth had been swallowed. Maybe not chewed, but definitely swallowed.

Reno sniffed and scratched behind his ear. "Guess that coffee'll have to wait, yo," he said, and walked behind Sephiroth's chair, so as to steal it while the silver-haired man was away.

"I suppose it will." Sephiroth relinquished his chair to Reno and went to the door. He turned before opening it. "What do you suppose he wants?"

Reno had taken off his shoes and put his feet on the desk already. Looking over the tips of his bare toes at the older man, he waved a hand and snorted. "No clue. But a guy like you? It's probably a promotion or something, yo."


	2. ShinRa's 'Proposal'

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII or Kingdom Hearts, no matter how much I want to.**_

**_--_**

_No need to take the elevator_, thought Sephiroth as he approached the daunting set of stairs before him.

He climbed the stairs, one at a time. No one is eager to see a boss like Rufus ShinRa. ShinRa was a conniving, manipulative man with a head full of evil assignments and plans of torturous future paperwork whose looks, like many great villains before him, compromised his true nature. A pair of cool blue eyes and a head of flaxen wonder made him a classic beauty, if it would be appropriate to call a man a "beauty," and in his case, it probably was.

Regrettably, Sephiroth found himself at the Shacho's door. He lifted his hand to knock, but was interrupted by a voice.

"It's open."

Sephiroth opened the door and stepped into the room, his loafers barely making a noise on the soft, white Berber carpet. He turned to see the Shacho himself, seated at his desk with a characteristically placid look adorning his features.

"Please, have a seat. Make yourself comfortable." The blonde man hoisted himself from his seat with a creak of leather and made his way over to the small oak table on the other side of the room, upon which was a coffee pot and a few cups. "Can I get you some coffee?" Without waiting for an answer, the young man proceeded to pour his employee a cup of the steaming beverage.

"Sir, if I'm not being too forward, why did you invite me up here?" asked Sephiroth as he took hold of his refreshment.

The younger man, who was on his way to his desk chair again, spun on his heel and put both hands on the desktop. "I want to make you a proposition." At the look that was apparently let slip by the older man's face, he added, "there may be a raise in it for you. A promotion, even. How would you like to be district manager of the fourth floor department?"

If Sephiroth had trusted his boss enough to taste the now cooling coffee in his hands, he would have spit it out at that moment. "Manager of the fourth floor?"

"_District _manager. Of merchandising." ShinRa smiled and took a dainty sip of his own coffee, making his way back to his desk and taking a seat.

"District manager. Of merchandising."

"That's right."

The silver-haired man frowned. "What's the catch?" he asked, realizing that ShinRa must have some ulterior motive; maybe he had to kill his father, or some other gang initiation type of thing.

"Catch? There's no catch... but, of course, there is _that_..." he trailed, waving his hand nonchalantly and looking off in the distance.

He braced himself. "Who do I have to kill?"

ShinRa's eyes widened appropriately. "Kill? Heavens no, there won't be any killing involved! It's just... I want you to train the newest recruit in the advertising department. He's rather green."

Relieved, Sephiroth settled back into his chair. He even thought good-naturedly about taking a sip of his coffee, but realized that wasn't such a good idea when his boss gave him a hopeful look, as though silently waiting for him to take a sip of some poison.

The door to his office silently slid open, and ShinRa added, "Did I say 'green'? I meant 'blonde.'" He held out his hand, indicating the visitor at the door.

"Sephiroth?!" cried the spiky-haired blonde in the doorway, turning a familiar shade of rose-petal pink.

The tall, foreboding man turned in horror at the squeaked version of his name to stare at the young man. "Cloooooooouuudddddd..?" was all he could manage to say.

And President ShinRa just sat back and watched it all play out, the smallest of smiles on his face.

--

_**I'm sorry there aren't any sexy parts yet! ...Well, sort of... I don't think anyone's actually reading this. --;; Why is it that people never read my stories? Well, anyway, if anyone is reading this, please review. Even if it's mean. I just want to know someone was interested enough to follow the link. Suggestions for future chapters are always accepted, as well. :)**_

_**Love, Chatty Harry**_


	3. It's Kelly Green

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did.**_

**_--_**

Images flew through Sephiroth's mind: their first date on the boardwalk, the lights of the Ferris wheel, Cloud's bright, innocent blue eyes gazing up at him with wonder, the water slapping against the side of the docks, the feel of the blonde's velvety-soft lips against his own—then the images fast-forwarded to the following hours spent in his apartment: the smaller man becoming overwhelmed by two drinks and getting ahead of himself, clumsily fumbling the button on his pants, allowing Sephiroth's tongue in his mouth to share a kiss far less naïve than the first...

Sephiroth's flashback was interrupted by his former lover's confused voice.

"Sephiroth, I—what are you doing here?" Cloud sputtered, flabbergasted.

The equally surprised man raised an eyebrow at his former lover. "I work here," he answered, running a hand through his bangs.

"You never told me where you worked..." His old flame sounded a little put out.

Sephiroth, upon seeing this indignant look on Cloud's face, frowned. "You never asked." He felt that it wasn't his fault that Cloud never got to know him as well as he wished he had now; he wasn't the one who had to "pursue a better career, a better life, Seph." He flinched a little at the memory.

Cloud recoiled.

All that could be heard for a few moments was the icy silence that can be heard between two former lovers; it was broken by ShinRa.

"Cloud, this is Sephiroth Jenova. Sephiroth, this is Cloud Strife. I thought you two would work well together." When he saw them both open their mouths to protest, he continued, "You may leave now," and picked up a stack of papers. The two men stood, frozen, and he looked back up at them. "I said you're dismissed. Go."

They left the office, Sephiroth closing the door behind them. As soon as the door was closed, he turned on Cloud. "How could you come here? To my place of business? Whatever happened to 'I need to pursue a better career, a better life, Seph! I need to move on with my professional life!'?"

Cloud glared at him. "First of all, I don't sound like that. Second, you knew I was in advertising, just like you. Didn't you stop to think that maybe, one day, I'd end up at the most prestigious ad agency in this hemisphere?" He turned away. "Or maybe your expectations of me were really that low?"

Sephiroth sighed. Cloud always knew how to chip away at his anger, make himself seem like the victim. "Sorry. That's not what I meant. I meant, didn't you ask who you'd be working with? Who you'd be working _under_?"

"Who asks that type of question when they get hired? I don't know about you, but I didn't expect to run into my ex in the workplace—much less _work_ for him! It's embarrassing for me, too!" Cloud shot back. He grabbed a lock of his hair, blushing, and twisted it around his finger.

Sephiroth began to make his way back down the stairs, not knowing how to respond. "Come on, I'll show you the office. Don't tell anybody about—us, okay?"

Cloud hissed, "Sure, I'll make certain to let everyone in the office think that the reason I got hired is the fact that we used to sleep together! 'I made my way up the advertising ladder the easy way! Literally! How was your day, Joe?' Don't be an ass."

At this, Sephiroth had to fight back a resentful look, for they had gotten to the office. He put on his poker face and walked through the door. "Everybody, this is Cloud Strife. He's going to be working with us for a while, so be friendly to him."

Cloud smiled fittingly at all the waves and smiles he received, then followed Sephiroth into his office. He closed the door and stepped on his foot.

"Ow! What was that for?" Sephiroth cried, biting his lip.

"'A while'? I plan to work here for quite some time, but thank you very much for asking my opinion of things, Mister... Sweater!" Cloud turned away from him and folded his arms across his chest.

"'Mister Sweater'? What's wrong with my sweater?" Sephiroth asked, tugging at the soft green fabric.

The blonde turned back around. "I know why you wore it. It's because you think it matches your eyes. But it doesn't. Your eyes _are_ green, but they're not just green; they're not forest green, they're not hunter green, and they're not shamrock green. They're _jade_ green. And that sweater isn't just green, it's kelly green. So you see, it doesn't really match at all." With that, he turned and walked out of the office in a huff.

Sephiroth stood for a moment with nothing to say, then looked down at his sweater. "I suppose he's right—it _is _kelly green."

--

_**So, what do you think? Better, yet? I thought that the part about the sweater kind of reminded me of **_**The Devil Wears Prada, **_**but it wasn't originally modeled after the movie. I'll try to make more of the chapters this long, because they've been really short before this one. Review, please:)!!!**_

_**Love, Chatty Harry**_


	4. Daydreaming and Lattés

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did.**_

_**CornCob, you kept this story alive! I was actually not going to write any more chapters because I thought that no one was reading it... and then I was looking for interesting SephirothxCloud stories to read when I found my story by accident and it said it had a review! Go figure, the day I decide to stop checking for reviews, you step in! And, since you are the first (and probably last " :3?) reviewer, I will grant your wish like a magic genie and mesh the worlds of Final Fantasy VII and Kingdom Hearts as was never done by Square Enix before! ...As soon as I can find a way to fit the other characters into the business world lol :3**_

**_--_**

Reno waltzed into Sephiroth's office. "So, Cloud Strife, eh? Man, that kid's got some blue eyes... a nice, spiky head of blonde hair, too... and his clothes sure are pretty fashionable, yo..."

Sephiroth nodded without looking up from his notebook. "Mm."

"Didn't you say once that you had a boyfriend who broke your heart that was in advertising, had spiky blond hair, big baby blues, and a killer fashion sense?"

The older man looked up. "Uh... yes, but that isn't him."

Reno ruffled his unruly red mane. "So, there must be a lot of guys like him in advertising. What are you drawing? Come up with anything yet?" he asked, coming behind his colleague to look over his shoulder.

Sephiroth crumpled the piece of paper upon which he was attempting to come up with a layout for the soapsuds project. "No. Not a thing. Maybe you should start doing your job. I can't come up with everything, you know."

"Well, well, sounds like somebody got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning! Kitty got claws!" Reno sang. He began to meow and hiss, scratching at the air with his "claws."

"No matter how cute you think you are, Reno, scratching at the air won't make me forget that you get paid to do so while I do the real work," Sephiroth grumbled, scratching behind his ear with the end of his pen. Lately, he'd been irritated. Cloud had been working at ShinRad for a week now, and he kept coming into his office and asking what he was supposed to do. Sephiroth had only been able to send him on coffee runs. Once, however, he had trusted the blonde with copying a paper or two, but it seemed that he had caused the paper jam from hell in the copying room; it took both Sora and Rufus ShinRa's secretary, Elena, just to keep the whole thing from exploding (secretaries have an innate sense for stopping paper jams).

_I can't trust him with anything; not with relationships, not with copies_, Sephiroth caught himself thinking, and shook his head to clear it of such thoughts. Cloud was a coworker now; he couldn't be judging him like this. But he had been doing so since the beginning, he realized: Cloud had not been allowed to sit in on meetings, conferences, or even brainstorming sessions. He had interrupted a few with lattés, however.

"Hey, Seph, wake up. Daydreaming about the new guy, huh? He _is_ kind of cute, if I do say so myself..." It seemed like this would be the week of interrupted inner monologues for the silver-haired man, for Reno was suddenly inches from his nose, his red hair looking absurd at such a close distance, his crimson tattoos ridiculously slashing under his bright green eyes, such a different green from Sephiroth's, Cloud would probably argue. The older man broke out into an enigmatic smile at this and poked the tip of Reno's nose with the writing end of his pen.

"I'm awake, Reno. And if I'm not mistaken, it seems as though you're the one daydreaming about the temp."

Reno snorted and rubbed at the tip of his nose. "Aw, you didn't have to go and do that, Seph! Now I've got pen on the end of my nose!"

"Don't worry about it. It's erasable." It wasn't.

--

_**I know it's short! But never fear, there is another one on the way! I'm thinking about throwing in a surprise pairing and focusing on Rufus ShinRa's love life for a chapter... hmmm... yes, I think I'm going to write a subchapter. The next chapter takes place right after Sephiroth and Cloud left Rufus' Office (yes, I capitalize that word when it refers to the office of Rufus ShinRa lol) at the beginning of the week. :) If people like it, I'll keep it posted! If not, I'll have to edit this chapter and delete the one that comes after it. Work, work, work! Being an art major is so damn hard! lol jk it's easy so far. :3**_

_**Visit my deviantart! The name's cloudmouth.**_


	5. Subchap: Employee of the Month

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did. And also, SPECIAL FOR THIS CHAPTER! A LIME WITH RUFUS AND TSENG! ...Who has a mystery job... :)**_

_**In case, for some reason, you decided to only read this chapter of the story (or you don't want to read my author's notes lol), it takes place a week earlier than the one before it. So, basically, right after Sephiroth and Cloud have been dismissed from Rufus' Office of Doom. Let me know if you like it! Oh, and also... Waves a magic wand for CornCob! Tseng!)**_

**_--_**

Rufus ShinRa waited until he heard the door close. It came, as anticipated. Then he waited to feel a strong pair of hands on his shoulders. This also came, as anticipated.

"Tseng, what would I do without you?" he asked in an abstract way, allowing the smallest of sighs to escape his pale lips.

The man behind him kept his composure as he began to massage the Shacho's shoulders. "Well, sir, you would probably hire someone else to be your personal office custodial worker." He could almost feel the carefully groomed eyebrows of the blonde in front of him furrowing in distaste to his answer. The corners of his mouth twitched, but Tseng said nothing, only waited for the indignant Shacho to protest and demand a more interesting answer.

Rufus twisted around in his office chair; his eyebrows were indeed furrowed. "Tseng, why do you insist upon being the most boring person on earth? Why do I put up with you?" he asked, brushing Tseng's hands off of his shoulders.

"For the sex, sir."

It was a simple answer, but oh-so-promising. The Shacho twirled his seat around so he was facing Tseng and grabbed his wrists. "Oh yes... now I remember." He pulled Tseng in for an insistent kiss, letting go of the wrists in favor of wrapping his arms around his standing partner's neck.

Tseng kissed Rufus back, somewhat hurt that his boss hadn't offered any other reason as to why he kept the Wutainese man around. But he would never let Rufus know that, of course. He straddled Rufus' lap and reached a hand up to run it through the blonde's slicked-back hair, knowing that it would irritate him, but he found it cute when Rufus was irritated.

Rufus bristled at the hand ruffling his hair and removed Tseng's cap to get back at him, but it just seemed to make the older man more aroused, as he proceeded to remove his jumpsuit and untie Rufus' tie.

"Tseng..." Rufus breathed, as his partner ripped open his dress shirt, causing the buttons to pop off and fly in all directions.

Tseng didn't answer, at least not vocally. Seemingly spurred onward by the gasping of the name printed in dark ink on his tan jumpsuit, Tseng lifted the President out of the chair, rolled the offending piece of furniture aside, and laid the blonde on his back on the desk.

Rufus gasped as he felt a hot, wet tongue run its way up his chest. He reached out to grab fistfuls of Tseng's hair, in need of a place to put his hands, and received a love-bite in response.

Tseng allowed his hands to travel lower, to places he was sure only the elite had dared travel before, and heard the Shacho let out a soft moan for his efforts.

Rufus made such wonderful sounds. His moans, his sighs, gasps, all were magnificent, befitting of his reputation and station.

But the best sound of all was when he called out Tseng's name.

This really was the epitome of the immigrant's dream, thought Tseng as he pleasured his boss, their clothes long forgotten and kicked into the corner of the room. When he had first come here from Wutai, he had thought that working as a janitor was degrading.

But the job had its perks.

--

_**Yes, "perks" is a pun, and yes, Tseng does have a jumpsuit/hat combo. lol, It's tan, and it says his name on the left side of his chest. He's proud of his sexy job. All he has to do is take out the trash and make sure Rufus is satisfied. Hey, it puts bread on the table. And Rufus on the desk, apparently. I'll add more characters as I go. Oh crap, I think this story is getting out of control fast:3 Please review so I'll add more chapters and fill in the missing corner of the Sephiroth/Cloud/??? love triangle! I'm starting to really like this story, but if no one reads it, there's no point in continuing it... ;; boo-hoo...**_


	6. A Squall On the Horizon

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)**_

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did._**

**_--_**

"So we're going to say, 'Sudsy Soap Suds: We Put the 'Soap' back in Suds'?" Reno asked, leaning over Sephiroth's shoulder and taking the pencil from behind his ear to circle the phrase on the page in front of him. "That's lame."

Sephiroth pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger and frowned. "I know, I know, it's terrible... I don't know what to do."

"I know what you could do," came a timid voice from the doorway. Cloud was standing there, holding a dangerously tottering cup carrier from some coffee shop or another.

Reno's eyes lit up. "Aah! The youthful perspective!" he cried, his forefinger shooting into the air, narrowly missing his partner's nose. Sephiroth snorted and moved back some.

"Ha, Seph, does worker's comp pay for when your co-worker shoves his finger far beyond the normal picking limit up your nose?" Reno laughed and patted the older man on the head.

Sephiroth just rolled his sea-green eyes and looked at Cloud. "You can put the coffee on the desk."

Reno frowned. "You mean you're not going to listen to what he has to say? C'mon, Seph, that's why he's here, ain't it? I mean, aren't we supposed to be training him?"

Reno's argument earned him an angry glare from his partner, who then turned back to the blonde walking towards them and said, "Once you put those down, close the door and sit down. We want to hear what you think."

---

The next day, in ShinRa's office, Reno was presenting the new layout for Sudsy Soap Suds to the clients (Soap Suds execs) and the President himself... and the President's personal janitor, who, for some unknown reason, had taken to excessively cleaning the desk. Reno had had to shoo the Wutainese man away from scouring the thing so he could set up the illustration boards.

Sephiroth and Cloud sat on either side of Reno, Cloud a nervous, innocent look on his face, Sephiroth with a slightly complacent smile that was becoming more apparent with each passing minute of the meeting.

Reno concluded the presentation and they all shook hands with the clients, who seemed bowled over by both the presentation and by Sephiroth's exotic features and formidable presence. An arrangement was made, to be negotiated later by Rufus, and the clients took their leave.

"Good job, rookie," Sephiroth remarked to Cloud, and shook hands with him as well; he allowed his hand to linger in that position for longer than was necessary.

The spiky-haired blonde blushed and started, "Sephiroth, I—"

That was when ShinRa decided to approach his three employees, a small smile adorning his precisely delicate features. "That was excellent. A magnificent presentation... but please do leave out some of the more risqué jokes next time, Reno. I think Sephiroth's presence is the only thing that saved us from oblivion as far as Sudsy Soap Suds is concerned when you decided to tell that 'rub-a-dub-dub, three hookers in a tub' joke."

The redhead grinned sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck. "Sorry about that, Prez..."

ShinRa dismissed the incident with a flick of his thin wrist. "Don't worry about it. I'm glad you three are all here, though. There's going to be another new addition to your department, and he should be here in a moment. I was wondering if you could brief him on... whatever it is you do there." This last was followed by a smile, but the smile seemed unfriendly in some way—as though he wanted them out of his office as soon as possible.

Sephiroth noted that his boss's gaze flitted to the janitor more than once, and he found himself wondering vaguely just what one really needed a personal custodial worker for in the first place, especially in an office setting, but his thoughts were interrupted—as had frequently been the case over the past two weeks—by Reno jabbing him in the ribs with his elbow.

"Ow! What?" he asked, frowning, only to realize that President ShinRa was standing in front of him, an irritated look on his face.

Sephiroth smiled uneasily. "I'm sorry, sir, did you say something?"

The blonde, a look of annoyance—or was that impatience?—in his frosty blue eyes, put a hand on his hip. "I said, 'This is the new transfer from sales, Squall Leonhart.' The next time you go off in your head like that, warn me so I don't talk to myself like I'm one of you artsy loons."

Sephiroth looked over at the newcomer, who was being greeted by a rather-too-interested Cloud; this new coworker was a brunette with blue eyes. Leonhart's eyes weren't as bright as Cloud's, not as striking, and Sephiroth decided that he didn't like the new recruit one bit as he saw Cloud give the brunette a toothy smile.

Not one, miniscule bit.

--

**_Lol I think Sephiroth needs to look into getting some treatment for his severe case of ADD! For some reason, I keep having him get lost in his own thoughts. :3??? So, who should get together? Is Sephiroth destined to be jealous and jaded for the rest of the story, or will he and Cloud enjoy a "happily-ever-after"? Leave reviews and suggest what you think should happen!_**

_**H and Ks, Chatty Harry**_


	7. The Pencil Breaks and the Plot Thickens

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did.**_

_**Also, special thanks to **__**dimonyo-anghel**__** for reviewing. :3 This chapter is for you!**_

--

Three days.

Leonhart had been working for the advertising department for three days now, and already Sephiroth wanted to make him a Squall-kabob with a crisply sharpened drawing pencil.

_An H5 would do the trick_, he thought, turning the aforementioned pencil over in his hands. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see through his office window the infuriating newcomer bent over Cloud's desk; both were laughing and pointing at something on the pad of paper in front of the blonde.

Sephiroth felt his grip tighten on the pencil as he shifted his gaze to focus on the two ShinRad employees fully. In a clear display of flirtation, Leonhart put his hand on Cloud's. Surely a public display of affection such as this was forbidden in an office setting!

There was a splintery crack that seemed distant to the silver-haired man; he looked down to find that he had snapped his pencil.

"Hey, good old H5 never did anything to you, Seph! Nobody loves a murderer!" Reno chirped from the corner of the room; he walked over and stood in front of Sephiroth, blocking his view of their two coworkers and bent down, waving his hand in the other man's face. "Hello, anyone home?"

Sephiroth gave his best scowl and waved Reno's hand away. "You crazy redhead, move. You're blocking my view."

He stepped aside and frowned. "Why are you so obsessed with those two? I think it's cute, yo... unless... Oh, see, I _knew_ you were lying to me, Seph; that really _is_ the kid that broke your heart, isn't it?"

"He didn't break my heart, Reno; no matter how much you wish it, life is not a soap opera."

"I wish my life were a soap opera. My love life right now is about as dead as H5 there," Reno replied, taking a seat on the corner of Sephiroth's desk.

Sephiroth tore his gaze away from Cloud and Leonhart to look at the young man on his desk. "You? You're a youth in your prime, you've got crazy red hair, a good job, and you're not ugly. What could possibly be wrong in your love life?"

Reno looked at him and smiled with an uncharacteristic softness. "Let's just say I reserved my feelings for a certain someone who doesn't return them."

Sephiroth tried his hardest to maintain his scowl, but to no avail, for he ended up with a pout.

Reno took the opportunity to lean down and plant a tender kiss on the older man's lips. Then he pulled back and sighed, turning away to watch Cloud and Leonhart from his perch on the desk.

Stunned, Sephiroth blinked a few times before opening his mouth to say something; he didn't yet know what it was, but he wanted to break the silence.

The silence was broken for him when Reno said gently, without looking away from the window, "Don't worry about it, Seph. I know you've still got feelings for chocobo-head. I just thought... well, I guess I don't know what I was thinking. Just forget it ever happened."

They sat there, saying nothing, for what seemed like hours, watching their colleagues nudge each other playfully and ruffle each other's hair.

After about ten minutes, Reno shifted from his seat and went to the door. He turned before opening it to say, "Seph, no matter how much you think it'll hurt, no matter what you think might happen or what he might say, even if you're afraid your relationship will change forever, you have to let him know how you feel. It'll just get worse the longer you keep it inside."

And, on that personal note, Reno left, and Sephiroth wondered if he really did have feelings for Cloud, still. It was normal to feel this way about someone.

Right?

--

_**So, what did you think of the surprise? Poor Reno ;; Don't worry, I'll add someone for him! lol I didn't plot out this story; I'm making it up as I go along, so I don't know how many chapters it's going to be! So far, it looks like a lot, but I stumbled across one fanfic that was, like, 38 chapters long, and I don't think mine will be **_**that **_**long... unless you want it to! Please review :)!**_


	8. Cloud Houdinis it Up and Sora's Helpful

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did; if I did, both of the games would be rated "M" for sexy male-on-male action! XD**_

_**A big shout-out to the--Checks stats--22 readers who have stuck by this story! I'm going to change the category to Final Fantasy VII; that way, I might get more reviewers. This is just to let you guys know, in case you find it through the "search" feature. So, with the next chapter will come a change in category, from Kingdom Hearts to Final Fantasy VII.**_

_**Enough chitchat from me. The story must go on!**_

--

Sephiroth sat at his desk and stared straight ahead; he was looking at Cloud and Leonhart, but not really seeing them. Reno had given him two things to ponder: his feelings for Cloud and the unrequited love of the redhead. Sephiroth didn't know what to do about either.

Before he had time to think of an idea anyway, his vision focused and he realized that the two men standing outside the window had turned to look at him, Leonhart with a puzzled, slightly amused expression on his face, Cloud with an indignant glare that plainly said, "Hey, Bizarre-o, stop staring at me."

The silver-haired man blinked and shook his head. When he looked up again, Cloud was touching Leonhart's elbow and telling him something that Sephiroth couldn't hear. He then marched into Sephiroth's office and closed the door. After closing the blinds, he turned to the other. "Why are you staring at us like some kind of weird stalker? You're not going to make me eat your blended fingernails or tie me to your office chair, are you?" he asked, furious.

In an attempt to lighten the mood, Sephiroth gasped. "Of course not! Fingernails? That would taste terrible. Where do you get these ideas?"

"Don't change the subject, Sephiroth. I like him, and he likes me. Sorry, but we've got a date this Friday. And don't try to pull any 'but you're scheduled for that day' tricks. I already spoke with Sora and told him to make sure that I wouldn't be available Friday evening." He turned away to open the door.

"But you can't date him," Sephiroth said, coming closer to the blonde.

"Why not?" he demanded. "I told you, I'm not on the schedule for—"

He was cut off by Sephiroth, who had taken him by the wrist and pulled the other to him, silencing him with a kiss.

Cloud pulled away, blushing, threw open the door, and rushed back to his cubicle, where Leonhart stood waiting, still looking puzzled.

The silver-haired man took a step out of his office and pointed at Leonhart. "Leonhart—"

The maddening employee smiled. "Call me 'Leon.' Everyone does."

He sighed. "—_Leon_. Take good care of him."

Leonhart smiled and cocked his head to the side as though he didn't understand. "Uh... I'll try my hardest not to break his heart, if that's what you mean."

The other man frowned. "Don't 'try.' Make it happen."

Leon furrowed his brow and looked at Sephiroth. "Sure thing, boss-man... did you have anything else to say, or...?" he trailed off, slightly affronted at his superior's defensive tone.

Sephiroth stepped forward until he was standing inside Leon's personal bubble. He looked down at the brunette and growled, "First of all, no one calls me 'boss-man' but Sora. Secondly, I don't like you or your tone. And thirdly," he looked to Cloud, who was pretending he didn't know what was going on, busying himself with darkening the outline on what appeared to be a chicken with dreadlocks on the sketchpad in front of him, "I don't call people I don't like by their nicknames, _Leonhart_." He poked the offending brunette in the chest.

"...Did you just poke me?" asked Leonhart, stepping forward.

Sephiroth poked him again. "It appears as though I did. You want some more pokeage?"

"I think I've had enough of your creepy stalker crap. Do you have a real reason to be out here, or do you just enjoy embarrassing your _ex_?" Leonhart inquired, stressing the word "ex."

The older man opened his mouth for a snappy retort, but paused when he found that Cloud had gone missing. "Where is Cloud?" he queried, his finger still poking Leonhart's sweater-vest.

Leonhart pushed his hand away and rubbed his chest. "What are you talking about? He's right—" he turned, seeing the leather chair and darkened chicken abandoned, "—oh."

Sephiroth smirked. "You've driven him off, Leonhart."

"It's 'Leon,' and if I recall correctly, _you_ were the one asking if I 'wanted more pokeage.'" Leonhart replied, doing a rather-too-accurate impression of Sephiroth. Perhaps he had been practicing in order to be more appealing to Cloud. Sephiroth smirked.

"I don't call people that I don't respect by their nicknames," he retorted.

Sora chose that moment to walk by, a pair of headphones tightly strapped to his head. He blew a gigantic bubble with his bubble gum and looked at his two coworkers. "Oh, hey Leon, hey Seph."

They waved dumbly, as though entranced; both had forgotten that they were fighting over Cloud and "pokeage" in the office.

Everyone was silent for a moment or two. Another bubble was blown and popped. "You lookin' for Cloud?" asked the teenager. Another bubble.

Leonhart and Sephiroth nodded.

Another bubble. The music was turned up. "He's not here," he supplied, and walked away to sit at his desk; the boy tapped away on the computer keys at rapid speed. He then disappeared under his desk for a moment, and reappeared with a sign that said, "On Break. Please Consult With a Coworker With Issues Regarding Scheduling." He sat back in his chair and took a sip of his diet, cherry, energy-infused carbonated beverage, tapping his foot lazily to the music blaring from his headphones.

The two remaining advertisers stared after Sora, perplexed. Then Leonhart walked over to Sora's desk and leaned on it. "Do you know where he is, then?"

The boy gave him an exasperated look and pointed to the sign.

"But this isn't about scheduling. I _am _a coworker. Where did he go?"

His answer was a second direction to look to the sign.

"Hey, kid, just because you're on a break, doesn't mean you can ignore me!" Leonhart cried, throwing up his hands in frustration.

Sora looked at him, his eyes fully conveying the message that he didn't care; perhaps he was having a bad day, Sephiroth thought, and noted that the boy had told him a few days previously that he and his long-time boyfriend, Riku, had ended their complicated relationship on bad terms. Details were not provided, but it seemed as though it had been bad enough to take the brightness out of even Sora's normally cheerful life.

Sora pointed to the sign, turned up his music, which could now be clearly heard, and popped a bright blue bubble in Leonhart's direction.

Leonhart, infuriated, snatched the sign from the desk and dropped it on the floor; he then stepped on it and stormed out to look for Cloud himself.

Sephiroth walked over to Sora's desk and picked up the cracked sign; he put it back in its rightful place and gave the boy a hopeful smile, but what he got in return was a cynical grimace.

"I'm sorry about all the relationship commotion, Sora, especially after what happened between you and Riku," Sephiroth said carefully, and Sora stared at him adamantly. "I mean, you don't deserve to be... around... Sora... can you hear me?"

Sora just continued to stare, and when he realized he was being asked a question, he smiled and nodded. "YES!" he yelled. Apparently he couldn't hear his own voice over the music in his headphones.

The older man smiled and patted his receptionist on the head. He then left the office to search for Cloud.

--

_**So, what do you think? If anyone's wondering, Sora was listening to some good old-fashioned Shirley Bassey—"Diamonds Are Forever." Maybe it will help him get over Riku, who will be introduced in the next chapter:D I didn't review this chapter very well, just sort of skimmed over it, so if there are errors or I repeat the same word or name like, a million times (because I know I do that; it's a big flaw XO If you hadn't noticed, I say hair colors, and the phrases "looked at" and "turned to" a lot lol), please forgive me. Or tell me, so I can fix it. Thanks, and I hope you approve of this installment! Don't forget, with the next chapter, it will be filed under the Final Fantasy VII category!**_


	9. Fifth Floor Chaos Or Bathroom Bonding

**_Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. Reno's in it, too :)_**

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did; if I did, both of the games would be rated "M" for sexy male-on-male action! XD _**

**_Just a quick author's note: this chapter is going to be the same scene, repeated from three different viewpoints—first Cloud's, then Leon's, and finally Sephiroth's—for a few reasons, three of which being that I was getting a little tired of calling Sephiroth "the silver-haired man," I'm trying to make a long chapter, and I'm getting annoyed at typing the word "Leonhart," when "Leon" is so much shorter. In short, even though it seems creative, I'm just being lazy and I'm in need of a change to keep my interest in the story. Enjoys! Oh, and by the way, if anybody can think of any more terms for "coworker," "employee," or "superior/subordinate," let me know, because I'm _****totally _running out of words to describe these people:3 _**

**_I'm going to start a "suggested listening" feature, which I've seen done with other fanfics, and I always really liked it. However, I'm probably just going to suggest whatever I'm listening to at the time that I wrote the chapter, because music usually inspires me to write this insane-o crud! X3 Hopefully it will pertain to the chapter, though :3 Okay, I need to stop talking!!! _**

SUGGESTED LISTENING: "Out of My Head"—Fastball, from the album _All the Pain Money Can Buy_; "Almost Lover"—A Fine Frenzy, from the _Almost Lover_ _Single_

--

Cloud had slipped away from his coworkers while they were childishly arguing and escaped to the bathroom on the fifth floor, one floor above where he normally worked. He had his hands on the counter, on either side of the sink, and was staring at his reflection. Looking into his own pale blue eyes, he couldn't understand why Leon and Sephiroth were fighting over him. He'd never had two men vying for his attention at once before, but instead of feeling flattered, he was just exasperated.

_Those two jokers are probably still giving each other the "pokeage" treatment and arguing over whose sweater looks better with whose complexions... They're like a couple of high-school girls fighting over a prom date_, he thought, and lowered his gaze to the sink in front of him. Warm water was streaming from the faucet at a steady rate. He leaned forward and cupped his hands under the water, then splashed some onto his face when the makeshift cup had been sufficiently filled.

Looking back up into his reflection, Cloud wondered why Sephiroth and Leon were so adamant about dating him. Both men were astonishingly attractive; Leon, with his chocolate-brown locks and deep, enigmatic eyes, and Sephiroth, with his strikingly beautiful silver tresses and seductive sea-green eyes that seemed luminescent at times. Either one of them could just as easily find another person that was much more attractive to date, but they insisted on this ridiculous (and until now passive-aggressive) feud over the blonde.

"What do I have to offer that they think is so different?" Cloud inquired after his reflection, and to his surprise, he received an answer, but it wasn't coming from the mirror.

"So many wonderful things," was the answer, and it came in the form of a brunette with profound blue eyes and a red sweater-vest that was standing in the doorway.

Cloud did not turn to face Leon. He was afraid of what would happen if he did, remembering Sephiroth's kiss in the other man's office ten minutes earlier. Instead, he contented himself with looking at Leon's reflection in the mirror in front of him.

"What do you mean, 'wonderful things'? I'm average."

Leon came all the way into the room, letting the door close gently behind him. "You really think that?" he asked, his face not indicating what type of answer he wanted to hear.

Cloud frowned sternly. "Damn it, why do the stoic ones always go after me?" he asked, more of himself than of Leon. The brunette let loose a chuckle, leading Cloud to echo the sound. His grip on the counter loosened as he relaxed.

"Cloud, you're far better than average. Look at you. Your looks alone make you one in a million. Light blonde hair, those all-too-expressive blue eyes, your alabaster skin—but listen to me, I sound like a cheesy romance novel." Leon was now leaning against the outside of the stall, his arms folded across his chest.

Still not turning around, Cloud continued to frown. "So I've got looks. So what?"

Leon smiled and said, "What you've got to offer goes far beyond looks. I love how you're so expressive without meaning to be; I envy how everything in your world is black and white—you hate things and love things, and you dedicate yourself so loyally to everything you do. You're cute, and funny, and the way you wrinkle your nose at stuff you don't like is the most adorable thing I've ever seen."

Cloud was about to reply when he realized that Leon was right behind him, and that he had his arms around his own, his hands resting gently on top of the other's. His counter-argument died in his throat when the brunette whispered into his ear, his breath hot and suggestive on his sensitive skin, "I didn't think love at first sight was possible, Cloud... thanks for proving me wrong."

Cloud gasped as a pair of lips were pressed to his own and, after a moment's hesitation, returned the kiss.

--

Leon, incensed beyond belief at the infuriating secretary and embarrassed at his lack of maturity, had made a quick getaway into the hallway under the pretense of looking for Cloud. Of course, this _was_ his ultimate mission, but for now, he just wanted to get away from his boss and the grumpy Sora.

He scanned the hallway. There was no immediate sign of Cloud.

Furthering his search, he poked his head into the break room. All he saw was a pile of bagels and a pot of cooling coffee. Burt was also perched upon the pole from which the drapes hung in front of the window. Burt had been the office pet, a rather ugly and loud myna bird which Reno had insisted upon adopting to boost morale a year previously, but he (the bird, not Reno) escaped a week previous to the "pokeage" fiasco, and was discovered to be partial to nipping sharply at people's fingers when they tried to "rescue" him and return him to his cage, so the fruitless attempts at returning the myna bird to his original home had been given up.

Since Leon was not at all interested in dating Burt (let alone having his fingers mercilessly bitten) he left the break room and searched the rest of the rooms on the fourth floor, but found no sign of the blonde. He decided to look on the fifth floor, which was where he had initially worked, and was familiar with the turf.

He looked in the bathroom first, and got lucky, opening the door just in time to hear Cloud ask himself, "What do I have to offer that they think is so different?"

Leon smirked to himself and leaned in the doorway. "So many wonderful things," he offered, and was pleased with himself when he saw Cloud jump. But when the blonde didn't turn around, he figured that the other man was angry with him, and decided to move in slowly to seduce Cloud.

"What do you mean, 'wonderful things'? I'm average," came the response, and Leon was shocked to find that Cloud was apparently unaware of his potential as a lover. He tried his best to keep his poker face on, and came further into the bathroom, saying, "You really think that?"

Cloud made a cute little pout, which was probably meant to be a stern frown, and, still not turning around, asked, "Damn it, why do the stoic ones always go after me?" That broke the tension, and they both laughed, a little uneasily. Leon could see the color coming back to Cloud's knuckles, which had turned white from clutching the edge of the counter. He took it as a good sign and moved closer when Cloud was distracted; he told him what he thought of his looks, how they made him one in a million.

Cloud cynically replied, "So I've got looks. So what?"

Leon decided then and there that Cloud was too dense for his own good, at least about his value to the dating populous. He made up his mind to let Cloud know just how he felt about him. "What you've got to offer goes far beyond looks. I love how you're so expressive without meaning to be; I envy how everything in your world is black and white—you hate things and love things, and you dedicate yourself so loyally to everything you do. You're cute, and funny, and the way you wrinkle your nose at stuff you don't like is the most adorable thing I've ever seen."

As he was speaking, he was closing the last of the gap between himself and the blonde, and he put his arms around Cloud's, settling his hands upon the younger man's. He rubbed Cloud's knuckles with the pads of his thumbs and whispered, in his best seductive voice, "I didn't think love at first sight was possible, Cloud... thanks for proving me wrong." Then he leaned his head around so it was in front of Cloud's and captured his lips in a soft kiss, which was, to his delight, reluctantly returned.

--

Sephiroth scowled at the fact that Leon had gotten a head start in the search for Cloud, but he knew just where the blonde would be, since he had known him before.

Cloud usually ensconced himself in the nearest bathroom, since people usually don't bother others in such establishments and because he was melodramatic that way. After checking all the stalls on the fourth floor, Sephiroth went down to the third floor, and, finding nothing but an unflushed toilet and an overflowing trashcan, went up to the fifth floor to check the bathroom there.

Hearing Cloud's voice, Sephiroth felt a surge of triumph. He was about to open the door when he heard Leonhart's voice as well. He was saying something about how beautiful he thought Cloud was.

_How sappy_, thought Sephiroth, _he sounds like a Harlequin romance novel. Cloud will never go for that; he might as well give up now_. And as he predicted, he heard Cloud bitterly ask, "So I've got looks. So what?"

The silver-haired man continued to listen in on the their conversation until all became quiet. Frowning with frustration, he leaned closer to the door.

"What are you doing?" asked a gruff voice.

Sephiroth whirled around. It was the fifth floor janitor, and from his nametag, he guessed that his name was Vincent. Vincent was wearing the standard, a tan hat-and-jumpsuit combo, and he had a cart full of cleaning supplies in tow.

"It's none of your business," he snapped in a hushed tone, and straightened, tugging on his suit jacket to right the imaginary wrinkles with which the jacket was plagued.

"Well, this is _my_ bathroom. I don't let the suit types screw it up for me. We get raises every six months depending on our performances, y'know, and the boss _does_ care if the bathroom is messy because we let you pen-and-paper white collars do whatever you want with it."

Sephiroth was affronted. "I wasn't doing anything to the bathroom! I wasn't even _in_ there!" he exclaimed, still whispering. "And could you keep your voice down?"

"Why?" asked Vincent, pushing past Sephiroth and putting his ear to the door, murmuring, "Dropping eaves, are we?"

The silver-haired man blinked at the boldness of the custodial worker and whispered back, "No, I am not eavesdropping. It was completely by accident that I arrived at the door when they began their conversation."

Vincent graced Sephiroth with a disdainful look from his ruby-red eyes. "And you were leaning close to the door because...?"

"Because I didn't want to interfere and cause an awkward situation!" Sephiroth lied.

Vincent stood up straight and put his left hand on his hip; the other went to his cleaning supplies. "So why didn't you just go use a different bathroom? I think you're bluffing. You're Sephiroth, aren't you?"

"Yes, that's me..."

"Yeah, I'd've thought you'd be better at lying. You want me to keep my mouth shut about this?" Vincent looked nonchalantly at the hand on his cleaning supplies and fingered the frayed sections of the rag that was peeking out of the bucket of sanitized water on top of the cart.

Sephiroth gulped. He wasn't used to being on this end of the intimidation spectrum. "What... what makes you think I'd care if you told anyone?"

Vincent picked up the rag and picked at the protruding strings. "Your face. Besides, everyone knows that you're jealous of Leonhart. It's been the talk around the locker room for months." At Sephiroth's huff of resentfulness, Vincent amended, "We're janitors. Our jobs are boring. Probably even more boring than yours. Once everything's clean, you can't clean it again—there's no point. So we hang around and talk about you guys. This is the most interesting story we've had for months... except the one about Tseng."

Slightly thrown by this knowledge of the underground world of the janitors, Sephiroth queried, "Tseng...? The name sounds familiar..."

Vincent nodded, his long black hair shifting slightly with each movement of his head. "He's the custodial worker for the ninth floor... the _only_ custodial worker for the ninth floor."

"Oh..." Sephiroth vaguely remembered seeing Tseng before and had an image of him scrubbing Rufus ShinRa's desk with vigor. "Wait... why does it matter that he's the only one who works that floor? There's only one janitor for every floor, right?"

"It's not 'janitor.' It's 'custodian' or 'custodial worker.' Stupid, I mean there isn't even a night shift for that floor."

He thought about it. "Well, I still don't think that's strange. I mean, the ninth floor is pretty much just the Shacho's office anyway, right? All he has to do is take out the trash and vacuum every once in a while."

"Right, and dust. So why keep him around all day?"

Sephiroth rubbed his chin. "...Rufus ShinRa makes a lot of Hot Pockets?" he guessed.

Vincent glared and threw up his hands in annoyance, one of which was still clutching the wet rag; sanitizer water was consequently splashed on Sephiroth's face. "You dummy... wait, what?"

The silver-haired man, wiping the water from his face, furrowed his brow at Vincent, who seemed unperturbed by the fact that he had thrown sanitizer water on a "suit type." "Well, Hot Pockets come in packages, don't they? Maybe the Shacho makes a lot of them every day and so the janitor—sorry, _custodial worker_—has to take out the trash more often than is the norm."

Vincent sighed and shook his head. "How did you get a job that involves intellect? _Hot Pockets_? Please tell me you were joking. I and the rest of the cleaning staff think that Tseng and your Shacho are having an affair."

Sephiroth blinked. "But—but that's imposs..." he trailed away, considering if it were the truth. "Come to think of it, he _is _always in there... and once when I was new working here, I walked in on Tseng giving the Shacho a shoulder massage... but I just thought..." His eyes widened. "How much do you think _he_ gets paid?"

Vincent nodded again. "That's what we keep asking him. But he keeps insisting that his relationship with the Shacho is purely professional. If you want me to keep quiet about..." he used his index finger to point between Sephiroth and the bathroom door, "...this... You're going to have to gather evidence that supports our theory."

"Wait, you don't mean...!" Sephiroth gasped. He couldn't spy on the Shacho! Just thinking about the consequences made him nervous.

"I _do_ mean," said Vincent. "You're going to have to find proof that Tseng and your Shacho are having a hot, sweaty love affair... or more than just the janitors will find out about your little listening session. I'll be back later to clean. No sense doing it now."

For the second time that day, Sephiroth gulped as he watched Vincent wheel away his cleaning cart. Gather believable evidence that Rufus ShinRa was having sex with his janitor or have Cloud find out that he had been eavesdropping on his make-out session? He didn't like either of those choices...

He walked away, so deeply wrapped up in his thoughts that the moans coming from the bathroom didn't register in his mind.

--

**_So, what did you think of the SUPER-LONG chapter? I like making people janitors :3 I was thinking about making Vincent a security guard, but then he wouldn't have much of a tie to the rest of the story. I'm posting a picture of Burt on my deviantart (just type "cloudmouth" into the searchbar). He likes to talk, but that part got edited out in the final draft of this chapter. But just know that Burt _****does _definitely have a purpose in this story; he'll come in handy (somewhat) later on! Sorry that there's no Riku, like I promised, but I didn't want the chapter to get out of control. I'll probably incorporate him into the next one. Until later, then! _**

**_H and Ks, _**

**_Chatty Harry. :3_**


	10. Crap Day?  More of a Crap Week

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengRufus ch. 5. From now on, because of the category, this is going to say "Riku, Sora, and Squall Leonhart are in it, too : )"!**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did; if I did, both of the games would be rated "M" for sexy male-on-male action! XD **_

_**Another quick author's note (I wonder if anyone reads these things o.o): Sorry it took me so long to post this chapter! I had another version of it typed up about three weeks ago, but I had to study for midterms and the chapter made absolutely no sense, so I started from scratch with it. I hope you guys like it!**_

_**Also, I did a kind of sucky job reviewing this chapter... I think I say the word "look" like fifty times. Just change it to whatever word you like best. It may not make any sense, but at least it will be like reading your favorite word!**_

_**Finally, I just wanted to say that I'm attempting to illustrate my story on my deviantart. If you type my username, "cloudmouth," into the browser on you can just click on one of my works. Through that, there should be a few links on the side of the page, one of which says, "view cloudmouth's gallery." Click that, and you can browse my images. : )**_

SUGGESTED LISTENING: "Torn"—Natalie Imbruglia, from the album _Left of the Middle_; also "The Way You Make Me Feel"—Michael Jackson, from the album _Number Ones_.

--

The next day, Sephiroth came to work, was greeted by a still grumpy Sora, and went into his office. Everything seemed normal.

Then he looked out the window that offered a view of the office and saw that Cloud and Leonhart had removed the wall that normally separated their cubicles to push their desks together. This was annoying, but even further irritating were the looks on their faces. Cloud looked unsure of himself but quite happy, while Leonhart sported a satisfied smirk. Leonhart was stroking Cloud's knuckles instead of working.

Sephiroth's eyes widened as realization dawned on him. They hadn't! ...Had they?

"Yup, they have, Seph."

He looked up. It was Reno, who was toting a bag full of donuts. "What are you talking about?" he asked, trying his hardest to stay in his state of denial.

"I'm talking about what you're thinking. They did the nasty, and you know it."

"What do you mean?"

The redhead rolled his eyes. "'Did the deed'? ' Bumped uglies'? Played 'snake in the hole'? 'Got jiggy wit it'?" At the blank stare he got from his partner, he slapped a hand to his forehead. "Do I gotta spell it out for you, Seph? They had sex, and they had it good, from the look in that blonde bombshell's eyes." He pointed out the window at their two coworkers; Cloud was staring off into space, his eyes wistful, as though he were daydreaming about yesterday's events (the ones that took place in the bathroom, not the childish argument in the office).

Sephiroth's stoic expression faltered for a moment. "...They can't have... I mean, office romances aren't allowed..."

"Please, Seph, don't do this to me. You know how annoying it is when you go into this denial mode?" Reno sat on the other man's desk, as he usually did. "Besides, everyone knows Shacho's screwing around with his janitor. I mean, what kind of hypocrite would he be to fire either of them for something he's doing himself?" He began to kick his feet.

"Okay, okay, they had sex. But that doesn't mean that they're going to stay together. Remember that time when you and Elena...?"

"Elena was different. We were both drunk, and it was at that company Christmas party last year. _Everyone_ had sex with _someone_ at that party, and you know it. I mean, come on, you and Sora's boyfriend fucked, and no one's said anything about it since. The company Christmas party is everybody's excuse to cut loose at work once a year.

Speaking of cutting loose and coming forward about your feelings, you haven't happened to tell Cloud how you feel yet, have you?" The redhead gave him a look that told him he was serious.

"I don't have any feelings to come forward about."

His partner's brows furrowed and he got off of Sephiroth's desk. He dropped his bag of donuts unceremoniously onto the desktop with a "thunk." "Would you just get over this idiotic phase you're in? I wish you could be braver and acknowledge how you feel about things! I don't know what I ever saw in you, you ignorant... pussy!"

With that, he stormed from the room. As he briskly walked by, Cloud and Leonhart looked up at him, shocked at this angry disposition from the normally friendly and amiable man.

A door slammed. Sephiroth figured it was the one leading into the office. He looked up to see Cloud and Leonhart staring at him. A glare from him deterred their gazes, and he got up to close the Venetian blinds so he could have a moment of reflection. Going to look out at the sprawling industrial machine that was Midgar, he saw some of the first flakes of snow begin to fall, and realized that the company Christmas party was in three days.

_Perhaps that's where it'll all come together_, he thought, and stroked his chin. Now that he thought about it, everyone would be there: Sephiroth, Reno, Rufus ShinRa, Rufus' janitor (whatever his name was), Cloud, Leonhart, Sora, and that dratted fifth-floor janitor.

What kind of sadist thought up Christmas, anyway?

--

A few hours after Reno's outburst, there came a knock on Sephiroth's office door. "It's open," he said, expecting it to be Sora or some such person.

To his surprise, it was the janitor from the fifth floor. "So, found anything yet?" he asked, closing the door.

"I've only been at work for a few hours," he peered at the embroidery on the janitor's jumpsuit, "Vincent, you have to be patient."

Vincent put a hand on his hip and frowned. "I don't think you have the luxury of time. I plan to announce my findings at midnight at the company Christmas party three days from now, whether I have your evidence or not."

Sephiroth's eyes widened. "But... why do you want to? What do you have against Shacho and his janitor anyway?"

"_Custodial worker_," corrected Vincent, and Sephiroth gave him an apologetic nod. "What I have against them is none of your beeswax. You just find that evidence. You know where to find me." With that, he marched out.

Sephiroth didn't like this uppity janitor's arrogance. He turned to his computer and accessed the company records, then typed Vincent's name into the searchbar to see what came up.

"Vincent... _Valentine_...?" He chuckled at the strange last name. If he got a box of chocolates on Valentine's Day, he definitely wouldn't want it to be from this ruffian. He ran his finger down the screen until he came to something interesting: a demotion six months ago.

What made it interesting was the fact that Vincent had been demoted to the fifth floor... after working on the _ninth _floor for three years. Sephiroth gasped. Did Rufus have a janitor fetish? How odd!

Scrolling down, the silver-haired man discovered that the only reason that had been provided for the demotion was "insufficient dedication." Insufficient dedication to what, he wondered, and decided to find the janitor and confront him directly about it.

He was about to get up to begin that journey when there was another knock on the door. Thinking it might be Vincent again, or actually Sora this time, he said again, "It's open."

However, it was neither of the people he was expecting. This person didn't even work in his office. It was a boy with icy blue eyes, shining silver hair that stopped just short of his shoulders, a muscular upper torso that was covered by a muscle tee, and toned biceps. A pair of pants that fiercely reminded Sephiroth of Aladdin (if Aladdin had worn chaps) and two slightly ridiculously large white and blue shoes completed his strange ensemble.

This boy was none other than Riku, Sora's ex-boyfriend of five days. He looked terrible. His eyes were sad and tired.

"...Riku...?" Sephiroth queried, standing up and going over to the boy to put an arm around him. "What's wrong?"

The boy looked up at him. "...Sora told you about... us, didn't he?"

He frowned. "He told me you and he broke up, but he didn't tell me why."

Riku sighed with apparent relief. "Oh... okay, then. Um... I just wanted to talk to you about something, if I could."

Sephiroth led the boy to a chair opposite his desk and bade him sit down. "Of course, of course. I have nothing but time." This last was of course untrue; in fact, it was a downright lie, since he had less than three days to either convince Vincent to stop his vendetta against Rufus ShinRa and his personal janitor or find evidence of their illicit affair, but he decided it couldn't hurt to hear the kid out.

Riku looked at the pile of donuts on Sephiroth's desk, puzzled, and shifted uncomfortably in his seat; he blushed slightly. "Well, the reason Sora and I broke up... ah... well, he dumped me because of something I said."

"What did you say that upset him so much?" asked Sephiroth, intrigued.

Riku's blush became more apparent with each passing second. "He and I had just... well, you know..."

"'Done the deed'? 'Bumped uglies'? Played 'snake in the hole'? 'Gotten jiggy wit it'?" Upon reflection, Sephiroth decided that he should never again use any of those phrases. Riku was staring at him, horrified, and he amended, "I learned those phrases this morning and I wanted to test them out. Continue. I apologize."

Riku looked at the floor. "He asked me how good it was. Well, he was really asking how good _he_ was, but I didn't know that when he asked."

Sephiroth shook his head. He knew where this was going. Riku had probably said something along the lines of, "I think sex is very important in a relationship," and followed it up with something like "not really the best I've had."

"I told him that nothing..." Riku said; he murmured the last few words of the sentence and buried his face in his hands.

The older man arched a delicate silver eyebrow. "Nothing... what? I can't tell what you said."

Riku looked up at him. "I said, 'Nothing can compare to the Christmas party last year with Sephiroth.'"

Sephiroth blanched. Was everyone bound and determined to shock him recently? "Excuse me?"

"Please don't make me say it again," Riku said, and frowned, as though he thought that Sephiroth was attempting to torture him.

"I'm sorry," said Sephiroth, picking up a pen and twirling it between his thumb and forefinger. "But... I don't exactly understand why you're telling me about it. What I mean is, it's sad that that was the reason Sora abandoned you, but there isn't much I can do about it."

Riku shook his head. "But there is!"

Sephiroth set the pen back on his desktop amongst the donuts and gave Riku a suspicious look. "Oh, is there?"

"Yes!" cried Riku, sounding a little more desperate than he had hoped. He came around the side of Sephiroth's desk so he was standing next to the older man.

"I'm curious as to just what it is that you think I can do," Sephiroth demanded, turning in his chair to look at the boy.

That was when Riku kissed him.

This really wasn't his day, Sephiroth thought, as another knock sounded at the door.

--

_**Ah, so much kissing! But, as promised in the last chapter, Riku has made his appearance! Poor Sephiroth; he's having such a crappy week or two! Who's at the door? Find out in Chapter Eleven, which is being written A.S.A.P.! I can't wait to write the chapter on the Christmas party; Sephiroth's right, that is where everything is going to go down. The Christmas party is probably going to be the last chapter, but I'm thinking about following this story up with a series of fluff stories, one-shots, and stuff from people's perspectives other than Sephiroth's! Exciting, yes: ) Keep reading, and please take time to review; I worked really hard on this chapter, and I want to know what everyone thinks!**_


	11. Knock Knock Who's There?  Predictability

_**Sephiroth works for an ad agency a mesh between KH and FFVII, Sephiroth's nerves and threshold for emotional problems will be tested! Cloud and Sephiroth used to date; now, Cloud's being hired by the very company for which Sephiroth works! When sparks begin to fly, will a new addition to the staff come between them? It's not as emo as it sounds... please review! Vucrecient sugg., SephxCloud, CloudxLeon sugg., TsengxRufus ch. 5.**__** Riku, Sora, and Squall Leonhart are in it, too : )**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, no matter how much I wish I did; if I did, both of the games would be rated "M" for sexy male-on-male action! XD**_

_**I finished writing this about thirty minutes after posting Chapter 10, but I had it up on for a while to see what people said about the end of this chapter. I wasn't sure I wanted to make good on my Vucrecient promise, but a few people commented and said they liked it, so here you go (don't get too excited... there isn't even a lime in this chapter XD)!**_

_**Finally, I just wanted to say that I'm attempting to illustrate my story on my deviantart. If you type my username, "cloudmouth," into the browser on you can just click on one of my works. Through that, there should be a few links on the side of the page, one of which says, "cloudmouth's gallery." Click that, and you can browse my images. : )**_

SUGGESTED LISTENING: Paramore—"Misery Business," from the album _Riot!_, and From First to Last—"Shame, Shame," from the album _Heroine_.

--

_**Where did I leave off again? Oh yeah. :3:**_

--

"I'm curious as to just what it is that you think I can do," Sephiroth demanded, turning in his chair to look at the boy.

That was when Riku kissed him.

This really wasn't his day, Sephiroth thought, as another knock sounded at the door. He pushed at Riku's chest to make him go away, but the boy clung even more tightly to him. Then Sephiroth tried to say, "Just a second," but he had a mouthful of teenage boy, and a mouthful of teenage boy is hard to talk around.

And so, to his utter horror, the handle of the door turned and the door creaked open. Sephiroth prayed that the visitor was someone harmless; then he realized that no matter who he knew saw him sucking face with a boy at least half his age, the outcome wouldn't be good.

Of course, to make his day even worse, the person who crossed the threshold into his office was none other than Sora.

The boy in the doorway dropped the stack of papers he was holding, his hands shaking; his lower lip trembled dangerously, and his eyes welled up with fat tears, which caught in his long eyelashes before dribbling down his cheeks.

Riku pulled away from Sephiroth. "Sora! It's not what you think!"

Sora's now empty hands balled into fists as he turned on Riku. "'Not what I _think_'? '_Not_ what I _think'_? Of course, you must just have been kissing Sephiroth for some other reason! How _dare_ you beg me to take you back, then sneak into the office a day later when I'm gone and tongue my boss!" He turned and ran from the doorway.

Sephiroth and Riku stared after him for a few seconds, then Sephiroth said, "You begged him to take you back _yesterday_, and you've already given up?"

Riku frowned at him. "You don't get our relationship! Don't pretend like you do!" He ran away in Sora's wake.

Sighing, Sephiroth picked up the papers Sora had dropped and set them in his chair, since the donuts were still on the desk. On top of the stack was a memo regarding the annual company "holiday season" party. For the sake of political correctness, ShinRa was forced to throw a "holiday" party instead of a Christmas party, but it usually ended up with a general Christmas theme.

The memo reminded him that he had been about to go searching for Vincent Valentine, and he set off to do so.

--

Sephiroth found Valentine in the fifth-floor bathroom, changing the trash bag by the sink.

"Valentine," he barked, and the janitor in question turned around.

"So, you've found something," Valentine stated, but inflected it as a question. "What is it?"

Sephiroth sighed. "Actually, I had a question." Valentine frowned, but leaned back against the sink to listen. "Six months ago, you used to work on the ninth floor. You were demoted to the fifth floor. Why is that?"

The janitor brushed a fleck of dust off of his shoulder and looked up at Sephiroth. "It seems I underestimated you, Sephiroth. You're a regular Encyclopedia Brown, aren't you?"

Sephiroth scowled. "Just answer the question, Valentine."

Scowling back at Sephiroth, Valentine said resentfully, "Yes, I _did_ used to work on the ninth floor as Rufus ShinRa's personal janitor. We were lovers for two and a half years, until I met... her..." He had an uncharacteristically wistful look on his face.

"Her?"

"She was lovely; the most beautiful, ingenious woman I've ever met! I could drown in her eyes..." He realized that he was being stared at and the look was wiped from his face. "So anyway, ShinRa found out that I was in love with her, so he demoted me to the fifth floor and hired Tseng." 

"Who was she?" asked Sephiroth, wondering what kind of loon would ever fall in love with this crazy janitor.

"She was a scientist. Her name... was Lucrecia Crescent." Vincent's eyelashes fluttered and he started dancing with his broom.

Sephiroth's jaw dropped. "Lu... crec... i... a...?"

"Yeah, but about three months ago, she was found dead in a cave," Vincent said, his face falling.

"I know," Sephiroth said, his eyes wide. "...That was my mother..." 

Vincent, who had begun to open his mouth to say something more, shut it and stared at him. "_What_? Your _mom_?"

Sephiroth nodded dumbly.

All the janitor could think to say was, "...Oh."

They stood in silence. Then, Vincent said, "So you're going to gather that evidence, now that I told you that, right?"

"Sure... whatever." Sephiroth rubbed the back of his neck and walked out of the bathroom, stunned.

His mother was in love with a janitor before she died? He'd make sure to pray for her soul that night.

--

_**Just to let you know, I have nothing against janitors. Sephiroth is the one with the bias against them for some reason. Maybe he was poked with a broom as a child or something. Oh well. Review, review! I only have nine of those, and I feel so lonely! ;.;**_


End file.
